Many aging adults can seem to become even more demanding as they grow older or as their health changes. Most of the time this doesn’t have anything to do with you, but you still see the majority of that difficult behavior.
Understand Your Boundaries and Your Limitations
Boundaries are a mental and emotional line in the sand for you. They describe what you’ll do and how much you’re willing to give. Many people find it difficult to set boundaries, especially with a demanding family member. As a caregiver, you need to be realistic about what you can really do and give, even if that means you have to step back a bit. If you don’t respect your own limitations, you may find yourself dealing with your own health emergency before too long.
Accept the Situation Realistically
In just about every situation there’s what you want to be reality and what actually is reality. Perhaps you wish that you and your senior had a better relationship or that things from the past were different. You can’t dwell on that, however. You have to focus on what is going on now from a realistic standpoint.
Remember You’re Human
You aren’t some superhuman Caregiver 3000 Bot; you’re a human being with a whole range of feelings, emotions, and experiences. That means you’re going to have good days and bad days. Some days you won’t be able to do as much as you’d like for your elderly family member and that may make you feel guilty. Just remember that you’re doing the best that you can with every moment that you have and give yourself some grace.
Get Help from Other People Whenever Possible
You can’t do this alone because you’re not that perfect robot. Look for opportunities to get extra help whenever you can, whether that means that you’re hiring elderly care providers or asking other family members to pitch in here and there. Even if someone can’t do exactly what you’re asking them to do, perhaps they can handle something else for you. It never hurts to ask and to see what resources you can tap into when you need them.
If you and your elderly family member are still having difficulty getting along well, you may be able to find some relief through counseling. Whether you go together or alone, talking to someone else about how you’re feeling can help you to find tools that apply to your unique situation.
If you or an aging loved one are considering elderly care in Howell, NJ, contact the caring staff at Care Street Home Care’s Ocean/Monmouth Division. Call today 732-719-7011.
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